Invigilation again.

Just a short one. Something i want to share so that i would not forget later.

When i invigilates an exam, other than walking and watching the students work their asses out to answer the question and find any possible ways to copy from their friends, i usually read the question papers, and try to answer some of the questions. Just to see, if there is any mistake, and at the same time to challenge my knowledge on a subject matters that have relation to my expertise.

wahhhhhhhh, expertise katanya.

Expert le jugak sikit-sikit

Anyway, one of the paper i got to invigilate was a macroeconomics paper. I just love macroeconomics when i did my undergrad, because unlike unit based analysis of microeconomics, macro look at the overall pictures of an economic situation and it is very dynamic and confusing since we have so many schools of thought discussing on the same matters, with different explanation but getting the same answers and solution.

So as i was reading, i came across a question which i think is funny.

The question was,

Q. Which of the following is true about the effect of inflation?

And one of the possible answer was,

A. Inflation promotes social harmony by uniting people against the government.


Of course the answer is wrong, but it is true in a way. The lecturer setting the question must be voting for an opposition party or someone very witty.

When we think about it, many government was toppled when a citizen revolution or coup de tart happen when they are not satisfied with the economic condition, especially when the price of goods increases and there are no goods to consume in the market, i.e inflation.


We have so many creative lecturers and students here.

Speaking about creative students, once in my tutorial I asked the students how knowledge management can be used by the government to integrate and streamline their service delivery. So I asked them the relationship of the government and how many type of government we have.

Most students answered 3, but there this one particular student who answered 4!

So I asked him again, how come there are 4, where does the other one come from, and he answered,

“Yes, sir, there are 4, which is The Federal Government, the State Government, the Local Government and last but not least The New Government”

Of course he was just joking, but I just love creative students; they make the class livelier.

Another thing I realized is, every time i read the instructions to the students, and before I let them write anything, I would end the instruction with a statement “dengan lafaz Bismillah anda boleh bermula”

I have been doing that since ages, and when I work here, I started to do the same thing. After a few semesters, I realized that most invigilators now, when it is time for them to read the instruction they will end with the same sentence,

“dengan lafaz Bismillah, anda boleh bermula”

I am not saying, I started it, but then again I never heard it said before in the previous exam. So I guess, dan dengan perasannya, said, I did have an effect to some of the colleagues here.

Emmm.

I am so proud of myself.

Hik hik.

Kuala Lumpur - Damai Laut Swiss Garden Resort and Spa Fun Quest.

On the first of November, a few friends and I were supposed to participate in a fun quest challenge cum treasure hunt competition by Katma, or catma or something like that. Basically it’s the Perodua Owner Association or something.

The race started from KL, Pandan Indah right to Damai Spa and Resort Lumut. The overall race took around 8 hours and 400 kilometers in distance to complete. We were given a tulips (a treasure hunt map, treasure hunters will know what tulip is), a list of activities to be done, RM57 for the activities among others.

Those who loves treasure hunting knows that treasure hunter competition or fun quest is the one of the best way to get almost free vacation, where everything else is prepared for you. For example, the fees for each contestant is RM90, and you’ll get shirts, caps and some other saguhati, comfortable hotel accommodations and 3 meals including breakfast lunch and dinner. But most treasure hunter enters a competition not really because of the cheap vacation, but for the thrill and exhilaration of the whole games and journey, but of course with one thing in mind, that is to win the competition.


So my highly competitive friends Kimi, and I, were ready to compete with his two other friends which I will call by their middle name Dumb and Dumber. Only that, dumb did not picked the phone until the night before the competition and said he is not going, and dumber sent an sms 6 hours before the competition that he had a family problem and could not make it.

Fuck!

So, I complacently agreed to go along with kimi. The only problem was, in one of the instruction, clearly stated that we need to go to Batu Caves and take pictures of “Gua”. And I reckoned that they will ask up to climb the Batu Caves. Both myself and Kimi are physically challenge although we are not OKU, because we will die of horrendous death due to lack of oxygen if we were to climb the stair. Because our stomach consume too much oxygen.

So around 2 am in the morning (just to stress the morning part) I went to a friends place and asked them to join us for the race which will be held around another 4 hours. None of them agreed to it, only until I used my ultimatum which is to beg and made up sad stories, how I would do anything for them even it will hurt me and how I will sacrificed anything for their well being.

It works.

Two of them, Naim and Zizi skinny ones agreed to join.

So we get back, had a little nap, and by 6.30 am we were all geared up for the competition. So our journey begins.

First task was to shop till you drop (literally) in Tesco Cheras. We had to buy few things from a list given. Being me, I had to do something funny so I decided to turn myself into a bowling ball and falls like an idiot face front and knocked a few flower vases. Luckily no one saw me falls, except I heard some loud giggling at the back, but I was so busy racing I did not turn to see who was laughing at me.

Fuck.

Second task, as I was expected, we went to Batu Caves and select of members to climb up the stairs and take pictures of himself.

Third task was to go to templer’s park. There we were given the traditional coconut grater and had to grate 100 grams of fresh coconut. That was kacang putih for me.

Then we shoot straight to Teluk intan for the next task, where each team had to eat 2 big bowls of ice kacang. I participated in this quest, because I thought I would be kacang putih too. But I was so wrong, I had a brain freeze and almost end up in a hospital.

Then from teluk intan, we went Swiss Garden Damai Laut Spa and Resort for a golf game (not the entire course, just on the green) and then after golf we went to the resort for the last game which was to put 3 pingpong balls blindfolded into a plastic container.

So each of us took turn to play the games, and it was fun. And I had a lot of great time.


So after the event, we rested for a while, went to the beach, attend the prize giving ceremony and then we went to lumut esplanade to eat Ice Kacang again. The very next day, some of us went to the Katma Annual general Meeting; while those did not attend the meeting plays some more beach activities and telematch.

My team, Kimi, Zizi, Naim and I, did not go to the AGM or join the telematch because we slept right until its time to check out.

So here are some of the pictures of the fun quest.

The Pantai Bharu Team



My team

Everyone was waiting to play golf for the first time in life

Lumut dorkyard

Where is this, forgot already

Tit man. hahahaha

Sila abaikan dagu tersebut.

Mat rempit

lumut esplanade

Lumut esplanade in the afternoon

lumut

lumut Jetty

vandals

Local government wasting money on cement arch that serve no function.

damai laut

the beach

the bitch

the island

Ohhh, did i forget to mention??

We won.

hahahahahaha.

oh my goodness, that is one bloody fat man there in the picture. i wonder who he is.

tapi third place sahaja. Oke lah, dari tak dapat apa. They had to minus 5 minutes because the second place team have only 3 persons.

Baca, Bacalah ...

I have an hour to blog, before I go into my utterly boring biannually routine, that is to invigilate an examination. Three hours of total silence, plus another hour to set up the room is rather unproductive especially to those who had to endure the pain and agony 5-6 times in a semester, twice yearly, not including the mid term exam.

Accumulated the time spend walking, watching and basically doing nothing is around 40 hours of peace and boredom a year. That is almost 2 days in total.

The best thing is, that is the only time for you to actually look at the faces of your students clearly and see how they look like. You can see the energy, hope and the optimism portrayed in their faces while they attempts to find solution for 4 questions only that will decide their future later, after spending almost half year listening to boring lectures, going for tutorial, reading a whole book and ancillary material, going to the library, doing assignment and tolerating wicked lecturers with very unstable mood.

It is also a time where we gaze with slight satisfaction to those indolent student we detest so much, and see how they strive and sweat so hard to answer the question, while in our mind we keep saying “that is why you should listen to me all these while”. While we sympathized and take oath to serve everyone equally, we are only human. To err is only human. It works both ways. Having said that, never have grudge to any of your disciples and always wish them all the success.

We are too exam oriented some might say, but exam is just obstacle you have to face to remind you of who you are, and what you ought to be doing.

And you ought to be doing it right.

And that is what we call learning.


by the way, i am wearing "protruding tit resistant" shirt today!

Hik

Holy cow!, look at those ...

As a government servant, in every Thursday we are required to wear cloth using the national fabric; the batik. Particularly, we can only wear Malaysian Batik, not the Indonesian one, or Hawaiian Batik, or what ever batik available in the world.

So we either go for the Batik Canting, which can be very expensive sometimes or batik tekap, which is not that expensive but if you wanted to look like you are wearing your mother's kain batik kemban to work, it is really up to you. Feel free to do so.

It so happen yesterday, i was wearing batik and i had to invigilate an exam in a hall which can be mistakenly identified as a refrigerator. It was so bloody cold inside it, i went to the toilet 3-4 times. Well basically i went to the toilet to smoke. Nevertheless..

Anyway, i realised something later what cold weather can have effect to your body system. It gets everything erected. Somehow our body react to the cold temparatures and increases its own termometer. If you know what i mean.

Hik

he he he.

that is one bloody fat hand isnt it?

Notice something?

Anyway, that is my Batik shirt. Orange and amber with butterfly motive on the side. I like the overall design, except for the peach coloured arm pieces which somehow does not really goes with the design.

Notice anything just yet?

Let me zoom the picture for our viewing pleasure.

------------------------------

Stop! here if you are under 13

------------------------------

Parental guidance are needed.

That is my bloody tit! protruding under the very thin layer of the clothes. My goodness i have been walking along the examination hall like a pornstar bimbo for 3 hours. I wonder if any students will be having nightmares later after seeing that and had to visit a psychiatrist to minimise their phobia.

So moral of the story is,

please wear t-shirt under your batik cloth if you have sensitive tits that will react with the cold weather.

p/s: No wonder my thursday class students were always happy, chirpy and smiling no matter what my mood was, and no wonder they are not looking at my eyes when i am talking to them because they were looking at something else.

Rasa yang tertinggal

My dear readers, yes the 3 of you. I have an assignment for you.

If you look carefully on the top right handside of this blog is my TV station, which i aptly call, My TV. Ingenious?

Yes, i know.

Now, your task is

1. Listen to both videos
2. Decide which one you like best
3. Tell me which one you like best in the comment area
4. Tell me the reason why you like the one you like.

Easy?

I have been tagged, Yeah!!!

Thanks Panzer, i was actually waiting for someone to tag me on this really. I am really happy to answer 90 questions so that 3 people who read this blog will find happiness reading it.

THE SELF
[01] Name: Duan
[02] Nickname: Dzeng /Dzengtoi
[03] Married: Not yet
[04] Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius/ Lembu
[05] Gender: Male
[06] Age: mid-30s this december
[07] High School: SMSSAASSA (try figuring that out)
[08] University: University Malaya
[09] Height: 173cm
[10] Weight: 3 figues
[11] Do you like yourself: Yes
[12] Piercing: No
[13] Right or left: -
[14] Are you a freak: Not sure, but to some i am.
[15] Hair: Black and very little
[16] Skin: Burnt Sienna (matured phyton hik hik)
[17] Allergic: To ugly people with ugly attitude, but think they are cute.
[18] What are you doing now: Answering this form at 3.30 am, because i can't sleep so might as well waste time writing this.
[19] What will you do 1 hour later: masturbating (hik, acah je)
[20] What will you do 10 years later: Answering the 73rd question of this tag, or probably dead (god forbid).

THE FAMILY
[21] Live with mother/father/parents: Mother
[22] Siblings(included you): 8
[23] Eldest: Sister
[24] Youngest: Sister
[25] Love/hate your family: They will be the one to bury me if i am dead, so i need them no matter what.

THE LOVE
[26] You found your another half: not sure
[27] If yes, who is he/she: someone else's.
[28] If no, who you want he/she to be: a bloody rich cosmetic/plastic surgeon
[29] Time(s) you in relationship: 4
[30] Ever woo boy/girl(0-100000): nope, they woo me (hahaha, but it is true!!!)
[31] Anyone woo you before(0-100000): A lot (this is true too)
[32] Did anything wrong to your other half: Yup.
[33] What was/were the wrong you had done: We met
[34] Ever argue with your other half: constantly and consistently, because i read somewhere that we must always argue to ignite the spark of l'amour or the flame will die (or was it, communicate? But, arguing is a form or communication too)
[35] You with your other half since: the day we met
[36] Are you straight/Lesbo: I am a proud lesbian.
[37] Reasons you love your other half: Do we need reason to love our other half, if we did not, why do we call it the other half? I cannot possibly love someone's other half.
[38] You and your other half in which stage: The stage where if we were to strangling each others neck can possibly be the next stage.
[39] You woo-ed her/him or he/she woo you: look at the answer on question 30 and 31
[40] Ever think of marry he/she: Not sure

THE FRIENDS
[41] Your first best friend: Nayanaramurthy (he is my nanny's son, yes i was raised by an Indian Lady and i can speak a little bit tamil)
[42] Your first enemy: myself
[43] The friends you love the most: Who tell me the truth and do not keep secret just because he/she wants me to be happy.
[44] The enemy you hate the most(1only): This one particular ugly person who think he is cute, but he is actually not, and in fact he is actually fugly (for those who do not know, fugly means fucking ugly)
[45] Your most beautiful girl friend: I cannot answer this, because later i have to answer many questions from unsatisfied beautiful lady friends.
[46] Your most handsome guy friend: Richard Gere
[47] The kind of girl you hate the most: Stupid one
[48] The kind of boy you hate the most: an ugly faggot
[49] You fall in love with your close friend before: Never. A word of advice, never ever fall in love with your friend.
[50] Your best friend is your ex-lover : Actually yes
[51] If your friend backstab you: I manipulate his/her other friends to backstab him in return
[52] If your friend betray you: I will just walk away
[53] If your friend woo your lover: I will make him feel sorry he did that!
[54] If your friend fall in love with you: I will laugh i think and say, stop making stupid joke
[55] If you fall in love with your best friend: Eeuwwwww NO!!

THE EDUCATION
[56] Are you a good student: Nope
[57] You always do your homeworks/assignments: Nope, unless the lecturers specifically said, there will be marks allocated. That is why i never do my homework in school, but i come early to copy them.
[58] The teacher/tutor you love the most: Cikgu Aini, my primary 3 teacher, because she is an angel sent by god.
[59] Always late to school/college: Nope. School : i need to copy homework / College: I need to sit infront because i can see clearly without glasses and you dont wear glasses it is just not cool, and you can afford contact lenses at that time. Somemore i am more of a visual learner, so i need to see my teacher
[60] Your class: i dont understand the question.
[61] You love your seniors: Nope.
[62] Senior who you love the most: none
[63] Your classmates good/bad: both
[64] Excellent result classmate: Don't know any
[65] Laziest classmate: Forgotten his name, but he is as lazy as an ass.
[66] Smart people: Roza Hazli, the only malay who got first class honour in the faculty when we graduated. I used to teach her economics, so i guess i am as smart as she is.
[67] Stupid people: People who do not know they are stupid, unconscious incompetence, but think they are smart, we call them bodoh sombong.
[68] Good looking people: Who smiles a lot
[69] Ugly people: Those who either pick their nose in public, or spit in public especially around area of a restaurant, No matter how beautiful he/she might be, they are the most ugly at that time.
[70] Funny people: Who do not laugh first before everyone else, after telling a joke.
[71] Cute people: those with nice smiles and squint their eyes when smiling.
[72] Bad people: Talk behind someone's back
[73] Honest people: transparent, right on your face straight forward the moment he knows anything.
[74] Acting people: a sore loser posers
[75] You are what kind of people: Definitely not ugly people like in no 69.

THE PREFER
[76] Lip or eyes: Lip
[77] Hugs or kisses: Hugs
[78] Shorter or taller: Doesn't matter
[79] Hesitant or spontaneous: Spontaneous
[80] Nice stomach or nice arms: Stomach
[81] Listener or talker: talker
[82] Romantic or rich: if possible both
[83] Good husband or Good Father: Good father

THE FUTURE
[84] Age to get married: Supposedly i planned to get married at the age of 26, but that was like 9 years ago, and i am still not married now.
[85] Numbers of kid(s): 4
[86] Career: easy laid back no hassle, and streneous job, where i dont have to make any sudden decision making where my decision will decide the future of my career. I just hate that.
[87] Salary: Enough to buy what we need in a month and have some for saving.
[88] Retirement age: 5 8 (government servant ma)
[89] Properties value: dont have any properties that have value yet, but if i owned one in the future hopefully i can bequest it to my siblings. Than only it has value to me.
[90] Wishes: Nothing that i could not attain myself, not to dissapoint myself in the future. But, if can, i would like to shoot someone right on the head and miss by a few cm and watch him wiggle and die slowly of brain injury. Better if he actually survive but don't remember anything accept the part where i shot him, of course he is already a loco at that time.



22 minutes. That is not that hard.


I am tagging Raja Putra Kamaruddin and Abdul Razak Baginda

Visit Malaysia Months.

October was a visit Malaysia Month for me. Early this year i went to Sarawak, and in October alone i went Kelantan, Perak, and Pulau Pinang.

I write about it later, but as a preview these are some of the pictures taken during the so called vacation.

On the way to penang, in a brand new Nautica, using the highway, with the help of a GPS navigator. As if the signboard were not enough.

Damai Laut Beach, which is not really a beach actually.

Open house

Reaching the end of Syawal, my friend, Zubir and i, decided to have some sort of very small gathering cum open house to celebrate Hari Raya do. We wanted to have a small makan-makan session with very close knitted friends, thus we could not afford to invite so many people since the house is too small and considering the too short of a notice, we were afraid that some friends would be taken aback and thought that we invited them last minute, so we agreed to do it small with around 20 people or so.

Little did we know that our close, very near friends are actually a lot, and due to a slight misscommunication both Zubir and I invited 20 people each. And friends being friends, brought along their friends too.

So the small gathering somehow did not look small afterall. But i was so happy, because somehow the gathering becomes merrier and more interesting and everyone had fun. I was happy because all my closes friends came, and accepted the invitation. Well maybe accept 2-3 who took very lightly my invitation. (*sedih)

Our main concern was about the food. Whether it is enough or not, will everyone gets to eat or not. However it did not become too much of a problem since i have wrongly budgeted the menu and we have too much food to spare. And the best thing is due to the miss budgeting of the menu, it actually served everyone well, and nobody is complaining.

Infact, i got a praise. Erin said, i am such a good host. Just because i kept on pouring soda syrup in his glass.

Then again, when you go to a open house, you don't really want to eat, but prefer to be close to friends and gossip around.

With the help of a professional chef, Ijat, who happens to be actually the guest, who happens to be early, and who happens to be free, and who happens to be more willing to help, zubir and i did not do alot because, it so happen that he was the one doing everything i.e the cooking, the table setting, deejaying and minggling with the guest. Everyone must have Ijat at their party, i tell you. A life saver.

I was late, because i have meetings until 3 pm. I cannot go out shopping, and Zubir can only start going out shopping for stuff after 3 pm, since it is a friday. So you dont want to be caught buying chicken in Tesco while everyone else are busy Friday Praying, isnt it.

So we end up shopping around 4 pm, and guess what? The function was set at 8.30 pm. So we have exectly 4 hours to cook for 50 persons. Actually less than that, because we only finished shopping around 5pm.

But, i am not that worried because, we are all professional. Zubir and Ijat are professional cook, and i am a professional emmmm, food tester.

So i am important too.

And mind you, the menu was very extensive. Well, its hari raya, for once you must have lemang and nasik impit isnt it. And since the budget was very tight, you cannot afford to cater, and also since it is hari raya open house, you cannot possibly cook meehoon goreng and the ever popular speghetti bolognese.

Zubir and i are confident that WE, with a very tight budget and time, with miss calculating the invited guest, will be able to cook something very simple comprising of:

nasik minyak,
kurma daging,
ayam masak merah,
acar timun,
satay,
Nasik impit, and
lemang

Somehow, on the day itself, and 4 hours before the function, it does not look to simple after all. But we managed, of course with the help of Ijat as our chief cook and Faie as our driver, haha.

So here are some of the pictures of the Raya Open House.

I have premarinated and fried the chicken before hand. And the chicken and beef were bought in the morning, so it somehow help minimising cooking time. A word of advice, do not wait last minute to buy the ingredients of your food if you want to cooked for 50 people.

The lemang in the picture was so lousy and i really hate the taste. I bought it in Shah Alam. Its a orang malas lemang, where they precooked the glutinous rice and shoved it inside the bamboo. Its tasteless and as you can see, i can only use half of it, while the rest clinged to the bamboo and ended up looking like vomit.

Preparing the condiment.

waiting and waiting in desperation, hopping that the meat in the kurma will eventually become tender, so the guest wont eat rubber slipper instead.

That is Ijat in black and Zubir preparing the menu, whilst i busy taking picture and look busy.

Thats Zubir in the checkered Baju Melayu looking tired, and Ijat in Black Deejaying. He is so multi talented. See all the guest are happy, because they are all smilling (Edi, Raz and Wanie)

I really hate taking pictures around skinny people, i look Fat. I am not Fat really, it is just the effect of the camera. That double chin is also the effect of the camera. I need to buy new camera (Za, Ekin, Acap, Wawan, Fie, Hatta and me)

Yeah right!!

Erin, Wan and Rosdin

My beautiful table setting. Isnt it beautiful. Green and Brown. For more rustic look, the satay was served in a basket.

Nasik Minyak and Jelatah/ acar rampai

Kurma Daging and Ayam masak merah

Chicken Pie and Cake gula hangus, which does not look like chicken pie and cake gula hangus in this picture (sponsored by Ijat)

Lemang, Nasik Impit and Satay. (To safe time, beg on your knees the Satay Hawker for extra Kuah and Extra Nasik impit, cut it nicely put it in a bowl and make people to believe you cook it yourself.

Sorry the picture quality are Hauk because my camera would not zoom correctly at the time of event. There are many more, which can be used at all.

So that was our open house, and i would like to thank everyone who came.

You know who you are.